Aside: good timing is only in retrospect

good timing is only in retrospect

so many would rather count their days like they count their earnings

not enough for me

so much more for others

so many would rather protect their earnings like they protect their feelings

not ever comfortable enough for me

so much more fear to share with others

No one is satisfied or comfortable because they deny themselves from releasing the exact pressure that pains them every day

their fear of having nothing to worry about

when you allow yourself to stop hating what you have and find ways to enjoy what you so dearly earned

youre forced to for once actually have fun again

and then take your first non insecure step into telling yourself “maybe I am just fine”

because the true reason you’re judging yourself your money and your feelings

is not that you actually aren’t good enough don’t have enough or aren’t normal enough

it’s that you’re scared or utterly inexperienced in letting yourself feel perfectly satisfied and content

that you today finally accept it can’t get any better than now

because it is scary to accept it can’t get any better

Suddenly you can’t blame anything else then

you can only blame yourself for your pleasure and pain

And that responsibility is what really scares you

theres nothing at all dangerous or regretful about trading out your workings for something tangible or expressing how you feel about something or especially someone

but there’s always something horrendously sad and unredeeming about holding onto your desires thoughts and feelings until it’s too late or you die

those truly human sentiments are the stocks everyone decides to cash out when the market is dead

or worse

when someone else had the balls to cash theirs first but you were too occupied with wanting more before you’d even consider their offer